Day OneHundredAndNineteen of being Aflickionless...

So thread.co.nz wrote this article about Style Pasifika and it was a tad wrong...

"MAC did an outstanding job of painting men and women alike in a wide array of “attire” in a multitude of colours and designs"...WTF? MAC? So Maz wrote an email to the editor (ie. how she felt ripped off seeing somebody else get credit for her hard work, and things like "your writing about the fashion industry you should know your A's from your B's; after all it would be terrible if you got a designers name wrong and mislead the public").
Anywho because of Maz's wee email the article has been fixed and they have asked her to write a piece about her effots as a make-up artist or about my piece and what I went through for this year's Style Pasifika.

Maz & Russell moved a few boxes to the new house today, Maz had stacked about 3 or 4 boxes before she noticed something sitting on the bench. To her surprise the something sitting on the bench was a box of chocolates, a bottle of white wine & a note that basicially read "Welcome to your home. Hope you have a happy & long stay" from the landlady. How awesome is that?!?!

Ginger Minx was on the board for last night, since Maz forgot her paints & stuff after painting yesterday. It was also the last chance to try the menu as you currently know it. Today is the Spring Party and it also means that Ginger Minx is launching some new drinks. YAY!

SJ on the other hand was at the Ed Hardy VIP Party looking at hot guys...hmmm...lucky girl!

Bidders have ramped up the auction for a home-made, interisland amphibious van to $6200 overnight. Yesterday the Trade Me auction had reached $5000, with 118 bids but during the past 24 hours another 19 bids pushed the price up another $1200. The matt black DIY boatvan, called Roofliss by its builders Adam Turnbull and Dan Melling, crossed Cook Strait on Sunday. It took 10 hours for the 65km journey from Waikawa Bay Marina to Mana Marina. The pair of aeronautical engineers, both 23, dreamed up the interisland voyage to keep busy and out of Blenheim's bars. They completed the conversion of the Toyota Townace for about $2000. Their auction description attested to the power of the "only van you can't get done DIC in". The van could end up alongside other great New Zealand sea-faring vessels in the New Zealand National Maritime Museum in Auckland. Museum chief executive Paul Evans said the museum, which also housed NZL32, Black Magic, which won the 1995 Americas Cup, was interested in adding the van to its collection. "It's something we think is very unique and it's something that the public of New Zealand will be interested in learning more about," Mr Evans said.

MOTAT’s historical Pumphouse, Beam Engine and Engineer’s Cottage have had a stunning success, scooping a 2009 UNESCO Asia-Pacific Heritage Award of Merit for the Culture Heritage Conservation programme. The Waterworks buildings and Engineer’s Cottage are the only New Zealand buildings to have received the Award of Merit, announced at UNESCO Bangkok. The awards recognise the achievement of individuals and organizations within the private sector, and the public-private initiatives, in successfully restoring structures of heritage value in their region. MOTAT received the prestigious award for its part in meticulously restoring the Waterworks buildings and Engineer’s Cottage, and therefore revitalising an important part of the city’s past, and capturing the memory of the community.

SIDESWIPPING IT...
This ad in the Whangamata paper appealed to Jo: "Free to good home, two mature sheep. Prefer vegan or vegetarian family."

In Britain, Simon Simpkins complained about the packaging of a German lolly called Haribo Maoam, which he said looked sexual. "The lemon and lime are locked in what appears to be a carnal encounter. The lime, whom I assume to be the gentleman in this coupling, has a particularly lurid expression on his face," he told the Daily Mail.

Surviving examples of Queen Victoria's underwear, including a pair of bloomers with a 50-inch waist, have been designated as important parts of Britain's hertiage. The garments have been given heritage status by the Museums, Libraries and Archives Council - an award exclusively given to items of both national and international significance. The bloomers are stored at Kensington Palace in West London and form part of the Royal Ceremonial Dress Collection, which is made up of 12,000 items that were once worn by royalty and courtiers who lived any time from the 17th century until the present day. (Source: telegraph.co.uk)

AUCKLAND FORECAST TODAY
N/A however the day was cloudy, bit windy with a few showers

CURRENT WEIRDNESS
After being the same for almost 6months, the Ginger Minx drinks menu is changing...

DAILY FOF MOMENT
Thread.co.nz fucked up an article about Style Pasifika FAIL! It's been fixed now, thanks to Maz...WIN!

Day OneHundredAndEightteen of being Aflickionless...

Maz went to Ginger Minx to do some painting. Your going to see it all when you get back. It's Spring so Minx is changing it up a bit, they also have the spring party on Friday night.

Maz & Russell got the keys for the new place today, EXCITING!!! Now they can start to move their SHART! So guess what they will be doing for the rest of the week.

Hope you can make it on Saturday night for the Welcome Back party...would be a bit pointless if you weren't there, it would just be people getting pissed for the sake of getting pissed...come on give us a reason!

SJ is currently a bit damaged, but who knows why. Is it fractured or not?!?! The lucky girl is also off to the Ed Hardy VIP Party!!!

Hopefully we make it to the final blog, I'm sure we will find away. But with the whole moving thing, it may be a hit and miss, as to if we get them all done. Wish us luck!

LOUD SHIRT DAY is on Friday 18th September. Just thought we would give you a heads up, so you can pull out those bright shirts of yours.

When Albie the cat didn't come home for his tea, his owners Andrew and Lyn Beale assumed the two-year-old tabby was busy exploring. They had no idea Albie was recovering from a brush with death and a 20-odd kilometre ride wedged into the front of Gail Tomlinson's car. Ms Tomlinson was driving past the Beale's Ormiston Rd, Manukau, property on August 20 when she felt she might have hit a cat. But seeing no evidence, she continued on to work at Auckland Airport, a 20-minute trip driving at speeds of up to 90km/h. When she arrived, she heard a "meowing" from the front of her Holden Commodore. A quick check revealed Albie tucked up in "a perfect little cubby hole" in the chassis of the vehicle, behind the number plate. Afraid to move him herself, a distraught Ms Tomlinson got a workmate to drive her car - "carefully" - about 2km to the Mangere SPCA, where a vet extricated Albie. X-rays revealed he had a broken back leg."I was devastated. I was just beside myself," said Ms Tomlinson. Fortunately for the Beales - who distributed flyers in the hope of finding Albie - the SPCA kept the cat in the hope his owner would turn up. Word eventually reached the Beales that a cat matching Albie's description was being held at the SPCA, on painkillers for his injuries. Albie subsequently had surgery, running up a final bill of about $2000. Now he is up and about, recovering at home. He is able to put weight on his back leg, which has two pins in it, and should suffer no long-term consequences. Vet Craig Hunger said Albie should be fine, as long as the Beales keep up his physiotherapy. "To be stuck in a grill and not fall off is a very lucky thing ... there's a good chance they could have had a dead cat." Mr Beale said that when Albie turned up on their doorstep about five months ago, they named him LB, short for Lost Boy, which morphed over time into Albie. "I think now it might be Lucky Bugger."

Fleetwood Mac have added a second concert to their visit to New Plymouth in December after the first one sold out in minutes. Having played a 55-date, sold-out tour in North America, the band had committed to a single New Zealand show on December 19 at the Bowl of Brooklands. Promoter Andrew McManus Presents said demand for tickets at the 18,000 seat venue was overwhelming and the second show had been scheduled for the following night.

A judge has jailed a Northland man who kicked his partner and baby after an argument, saying society has had enough of such abuse. Michael Luke, from Whangarei, was sentenced in Whangarei District Court to 12 months imprisonment after attacking his partner at his home on July 9, the Northern Advocate reported. (Well I thought that was going to be more interesting, especially since the headline was "Man who kicked partner, baby jailed".)

A complaint will be made to the Independent Police Conduct Authority after a Wellington student allegedly had his neck broken by a police baton as a party was shut down. Police were called to a Khandallah party last Friday after gatecrashers began fighting outside, Fairfax Media reported. Although the gatecrashers fled when police arrived, 18 officers entered the house and used batons to drive the remaining 40 guests from the house, the partygoers claimed. Jakob Christie, 19, said the end of a police baton was jabbed into his neck, causing a vertebrae to break. He woke on Saturday unable to move his head and X-rays showed a lower neck vertebrae had broken.

Just a third of students going into secondary school are numerate, says a maths lecturer from the University of Auckland. And because secondary schools focus on algebra, trigonometry, geometry and statistics rather than basic number problems, they may never get a chance to learn the essentials - in fact, numeracy can worsen. (Yes, we are a nation of STUPID RETARDS!)

The demise of fuel storage at the Tank Farm means cruise ships and large cargo vessels in Auckland will be refuelled directly from a new tanker, the Awanuia. The 80m vessel can hold the equivalent of 25,000 barrels of fuel which it will ship directly from the Marsden Point oil refinery. It will replace a smaller barge which used to take on fuel at Wynyard Quarter and then supply visiting ships. The Awanuia was built in Turkey for around $20 million for Seafuels, a joint-venture company involving Ports of Auckland and Pacific Basin Shipping and is under charter to Shell.

The future of a subdivision intended to save tribal land from being mortgaged off is hanging in the balance. The Maori Land Court appointed interim administrator Kevin Gillespie eight years ago to control the affairs of Matauri X, a land incorporation which had amassed a $2.5 million debt after a water bottling deal went bust. But debt levels have risen to $16 million because of a refinancing deal with Strategic Finance to complete a two-stage, 139-section subdivision. A critical point for Maori landowners was that the sections were not freehold, instead they were subject to 52-year lease terms. But of the 81 sections, which have been on the market for 18 months, only eight of 25 sales had been settled, with many buyers trying to back out of their deals because of the economic climate, Mr Gillespie said. No houses have been built yet.

NEW STYLE PASIFIKA PHOTOS

SIDESWIPPING IT...
Margaret Wong of Epsom writes: "I was walking around One Tree Hill when I spotted a lone paddock of black sheep and lambs. The white sheep and lambs were gambolling freely all over the rest of the park. It was all a bit District 9 ... No doubt someone will be able to enlighten us." (you know the South African's are going woohoo)

Two girls lost in a stormwater drain in Adelaide updated their Facebook status via their mobile phone rather than ringing emergency services. A Fire Service spokesman said the 10- and 12-year-old girls were lucky another young friend was online and was able to call for help for them. Walking through drains is known as "urban caving", is popular in many major cities, despite the danger of flash floods.

A reader writes: "In 2001, my wife went for a precautionary mammogram because of a 4mm lump. We never heard any more about it but were delighted to receive the x-rays today (eight years later) with a letter to say that there is nothing to worry about. Except maybe the Health Service?" (SJ...SEE...YOU AREN'T THE ONLY ONE!!!)

AUCKLAND FORECAST TODAY
Max: 17°C
Min: 10°C (overnight)
Humidity: 83%
Cloud increasing. Northeast breeze. (Translation: Nice sunny day, YES sun again, but its about to all turn to shite)

CURRENT WEIRDNESS
"What is & isn't photography over mai tai's Yay" - check it out FB

AND the morpork still doesn't have Swine Flu...bwahahahaha!

DAILY FOF MOMENT
People not knowing if SJ's foot is really fratured or not. X-ray people say "yes, fractured" 'experts' say "Nope...nothing wrong" FAIL!

Day OneHundredAndTen of being Aflickionless...

First she destroyed disco balls, now she has destroyed a peacock pelt. Yes Maz has been working hard on her Style Pasifika stuff. Only a few more days to go now, two more rehearsals before Friday and then it's time to sparkle and dazzle. SPARKLE & DAZZLE!!!

Jim Bolger is the biggest spender on domestic travel perks available to former prime ministers and governors-general, racking up $36,000 in expenses in 2008. An Official Information Act request from NZPA has revealed that five former prime ministers and four former governors-general had taxpayer funded domestic travel. Former National prime minister Jim Bolger spent $27,191 on chauffeur-driven cars, $5562 on self-driven cars and $3400 on domestic airfares. Mr Bolger has a number of high profile roles including chairing New Zealand Post. Sir Paul Reeves was the most expensive former governor-general with $28,100 in expenses - $22,794 in chauffeur-driven cars and $5306 on domestic flights The second most expensive governor-general was Dame Cath Tizard with $14,083 on chauffeur-driven cars and $2707 on airfares. Sir Michael Hardie Boys spent just $1404 on air travel and $4646 on chauffeur-driven cars. The second highest former prime minister was Sir Geoffrey Palmer with $26,055 made up of $14,187 on chauffeur-driven cars, $10,078 on domestic airfares and $1791 on self-drive cars.Police have been called in after a group of youths armed with a baseball bat allegedly barged into an Auckland high school and beat a student while he was in class, TVNZ news is reporting. The assault happened yesterday at Lynfield College. The report claims a 14-year-old boy was attacked in front of his classmates and their teacher, possibly over a dispute about comments on social networking website Bebo. The report went on to say the victim of the attack, who was not seriously injured, did not turn up for school today.

A quake measuring six on the Richter scale has struck off the Bay of Plenty coast. The quake struck just after mid-day, 60km north of White Island. It had a focal depth of 250km and, according to the GNS website, was felt around the lower half of the North Island and upper South Island. Computer users as far south as Nelson and as far north as Napier reported feeling the quake.

Auckland City Council is planning a $23 million upgrade of Fort St which will turn the street into a shared space where vehicles and pedestrians will share the road. Details revealed yesterday show Fort St 's history as part of Auckland's former foreshore will be incorporated with markers to show where the sea was before reclamation began in 1859. Artworks and trees will be added to the area, as well as lighting features to make it safer for pedestrians at night. Stone paving will be laid over the street, kerbs and private vehicle parking removed and vehicle loading times will be limited. The council said shared spaces combined the functions of a street so there would be more space for pedestrians, creating an attractive space for people to spend time without the need to ban vehicles.

Auckland's new laboratory company is blaming an administrative error after a GP was kept waiting 16 days for the results of tests he ordered for a cancer patient.

Police officers will get a 2 per cent pay rise this year. Police Association president Greg O'Connor said he was happy with the result of the arbitration, which was announced yesterday. The 2 per cent pay rise for the association's 8500 members, or about 98 per cent of sworn officers, would meet or exceed most members' expectations, Mr O'Connor said. The starting salary for a constable will rise to $51,000.

It's not global warming, it's just good weather - last month was the warmest August New Zealand has seen since temperatures were first recorded 155 years ago. New Zealanders could thank strong westerly winds coming off Australia for an average temperature almost 2degC warmer than usual, said Auckland climate scientist Jim Salinger. The average temperature for New Zealand last month was 10.4degC, which gave the normally wintery month the kind of temperatures usually seen in spring. Regions that registered the highest temperatures above average were areas such as Central Otago and inland Canterbury, where the Australian air kept both days and nights relatively warm. Auckland and Tauranga shared the title of the warmest main centre for August, while Wellington was both the sunniest and wettest, Dunedin the driest, and Christchurch the coolest. Niwa's outlook for spring said New Zealanders c ould continue to expect warmer weather than usual throughout September, although there was likely to be a change mid-spring. (FUCK ME it was still cold though)

QUESTION OF THE DAY??
New Zealand's biggest secondary school has banned school balls after parents helped students to organise a boozy after-ball function. Rangitoto College principal David Hodge said the school had been deceived when about 150 Year 12 students were taken by bus from the North Shore to a disused Onehunga warehouse for the August 13 bash. The college, in Mairangi Bay, had heard about plans for the party, but parents and students, when confronted, had assured staff it would be cancelled. "We were deceived, we were lied to," Mr Hodge said. Should high school after-ball parties be banned?

SIDESWIPPING IT...
A reader writes: "I was taken aside for a random security check at Auckland Airport - to my shock, my handbag (which goes everywhere with me) tested positive for explosives or fertiliser residue. My bag was tested again but the machine refused to give any result at all ... Still, a sniffer dog was brought out to investigate my bag (he was more interested in the carpet), and the contents were searched, all to no avail. My main concern, though, is that before I was let go to board my flight, I was asked to write down my name, occupation, home address and phone number ... then I was free to leave. If I had been a terrorist working with explosives, I'm glad they knew how to reach me when I got home again!"

An underwhelming number of worms included in this Bay of Plenty Times classified ad.

AUCKLAND FORECAST TODAY
Max: 17°C
Min: 8°C (overnight)
Humidity: 93%
Cloudy spells, chance shower in the west.Northwesterly. (Translation: Cloudy and a little chilly)

CURRENT WEIRDNESS
Today is Random Acts of Kindness Day...BE NICE!!!

DAILY FOF MOMENT
Maz was woken up at 3am by a Facebook status update (wonder who that could of been). Lucky she could get back to sleep, but still...FAIL!

Day OneHundredAndNine of being Aflickionless...

Maz & Russell went and signed the papers for their new place today. And thought while they were at it they might as well also visit Russell's mum.

"10 more days till Haydn gets back, 10 more days till he returns, wake up one day and fuck around, 9 days till Haydn gets back"

Wanganui District Council banned gang patches from the city at its council meeting today. The bylaw, which comes into force on tomorrow, will give police powers to fine patchwearers $2000 and to take their gang insignia from them. "This bylaw is intended to deal with.... gangs, but will not affect clubs and groups who are law-abiding and non-confrontational generally," a report on the gang bylaw submissions hearing, tabled at today's meeting by senior councillor Randhir Dahya, said. (bylaw goes into effect at midnight)

An Auckland man is taking on soft drink giant Coca-Cola Amatil after he was struck in the eye by an exploding fruit juice bottle. Chinese immi grant Ming Fu Hu, who runs a drink bar in Northcote, was injured in the eye by an exploding bottle of Keri orange juice, which had fermented, on May 21. Mr Hu told NZPA still could not see very well and would probably not recover his full vision. The injury had cost him about $5000 and the Accident Compensation Corporation had only covered part of the cost of treatment. Coca-Cola confirmed to him the 2.4 litre bottle of Keri juice was fermented. As a gesture of goodwill it offered him a case of Keri orange juice and grocery vouchers to the value of $200.

Police cordoned off part of Swanson St in central Auckland this afternoon due to fears that a window could fall. A police spokesman said the window had come loose and could have come down "like a piece of paper". The loose window was on the eleventh floor. The building is on the corner of Swanson and Mills Lane and the road has now re-opened.

The Hospitality Association says two controversial pub promotions are pushing the boundaries. A bar in Whangarei is offering a refillable cup for only ten dollars while a Hamilton establishment has all you can drink for only $39. Association spokesman Bruce Robertson is confident the relevant agencies will be making sure there are terms and conditions which keep the promotions within the law. Mr Robertson says such conditions could be a limit on how many drinks people can have per hour and cheap meal deals.

Thousands of small children - many clutching tiny bouquets, cuddly toys and glittery cards - filed into the Auckland Zoo to say goodbye to their biggest friend, Kashin the elephant. About 17,000 people - most of them children - were at the zoo yesterday to pay their final respects to Kashin, who died last week. Colourful drawings, fruit, cards and tiny flowers tied with string adorned Kashin's grave, as children and their parents gathered to say goodbye. Youngsters were invited to write messages on a day all about Kashin - with large elephant bouncy castles, elephant face painting and a special video and photo display of Kashin.

SIDESWIPPING IT...
According to Anthony Smith, the electronic sign outside Takapuna Normal Intermediate School in Northcote Rd has this message displayed: "Teahcers only day 24 August."

For more than 200 years, when anyone in Marlborough, Wiltshire, fell ill it was easy to know whom to turn to: Dr Maurice. Members of the Maurice family have served at the local medical practice since 1792. But after six generations of Dr Maurices, the last of the line, Dr David Maurice, 59, is preparing to retire. His son, James, has just qualified in the profession but is planning to spend his career as a hospital doctor.

AUCKLAND FORECAST TODAY
Max: 16°C
Min: 9°C (overnight)
Humidity: 78%
Fine spells, chance of a shower. Westerlies easing. (Translation: sun...showers...average day really)

CURRENT WEIRDNESS
Is it just us, or do those motorway lights encourage drag racing?

DAILY FOF MOMENT
SJ went past a police car that had pulled over a van. The van had "Catch me if you can" written on it. FAIL!

Day OneHundredAndSix of being Aflickionless...

JayJay has a custom pair of bunny ear. If they are custom then that must mean they are JadedSphnix, and you would be right in thinking that. They have been made for Chemistry. So photos of them will go up tomorrow night. Maz is also going to make custom bunny ears & other animal ears to go with all the other custom stuff.

This afternoon Maz & Russell had to go look at a place on Rosebank Road, was nice but right at the intersection by Avondale Racetrack, so heaps of road noise. STINK! After that it was time to go to the first Style Pasifika rehearsal...one week to go. JayJay is lined up to be 4th on stage on the night. Exciting! oOo and one of the artists in the competition is one of Maz's former tutors.
After the Style Pasifika run through it was off to Ginger Minx for A drink...but hmmmm it turned into two for Maz. SJ also popped in to Minx, but missed Maz by that much...which isn't much. She walked in, as Maz, Russell & JayJay drove off. Very quite night at Minx...well it was at about 8.30pm.

A large earthquake in Wellington early this morning shook locals out of bed but there were no immediate reports of damage. The tremor, measuring 5.2 in magnitude, hit at 2.10am, GNS Science reported. It was centred 20km south of Wellington and was 30km deep. It was followed by a 4.3 aftershock at 3.52am.

Health authorities have lifted their warning on people going to beaches in the Hauraki Gulf. The Auckland Regional Public Health Service (ARPHS) lifted the warning today but recommended people take extra care. The warning was put in place last month after marine life and dogs were found dead at Narrowneck and Cheltenham beaches. Approximately 15 dogs from a wide geographic area within the Hauraki Gulf became unwell with symptoms consistent with tetrodotoxin (ttx) poisoning. Five of the dogs died.

QUESTION OF THE DAY...
Diagnostic Medlab has hired a film crew to interview patients emerging from the rooms of its rival, Labtests, and has threatened to release the footage if it finds undisclosed problems. A public health chief last night slammed the move as "desperate". Is switching from Diagnostic Medlab to Labtests Auckland a good idea?

SIDESWIPPING IT...
The Vegetarian Star reports that executive producer for The Simpsons, David Mirkin, says Paul McCartney agreed to appear on the cartoon only with certain conditions. "When I asked him to do the vegetarian episode, he agreed but made me promise to keep Lisa as a vegetarian - and I was happy to comply with that because I'm a vegetarian too. Every time I see him, he always checks - and he's always surrounded by nine or 10 lawyers, so it's quite frightening!

Sharon writes: "A colleague came into work a couple of weeks ago as mad as hell. She and her 16-year-old had a heated discussion on the way to dropping daughter off at school. Mother angrily declared 'you're grounded!' Daughter's comeback was great. 'You can't ground me! I've got a ranch slider and a bus pass!' ... daughter 1, mum 0."

TRAILER, TRAILER, TRAILER...
Interesting fact. All movies that come out have a website, pure and simple a .com, but Wolfman also has a .co.nz...how cool is that?



AUCKLAND FORECAST TODAY
Max: 18°C
Min: 9°C (overnight)
Humidity: 89%
Fine, a few cloudy periods. Northwest winds. (Translation: Fairly nice day...bit chilly this evening though)

CURRENT WEIRDNESS
Style Pasifika is only a week away now...

DAILY FOF MOMENT
Dave was about to walk out the door to dj at Degree and realised that Gabbie's g-string was hanging out of the back of his shoe. FAIL! Haha Imagine if he got all the way to Degree and didn't notice.

Day OneHundredAndFive of being Aflickionless...

Maz forgot about the guy that SJ saw last night standing on K Road. No, she wasn't looking for a good time, rolling the streets of dirty old K'Road. He caught her attention because he stood holding a sign that read: "New Escourts. 021 creamit" or something along those lines, but that was def the number. What a dodgy number!

So your in LA now, gearing up for burning man...well okay not quite there, your flying around up in the sky somewhere...I think.
Speaking of Burning Man, here is something of interest that I found while jumping around the web.
"As I prepare for my seventh trip to Burning Man this weekend, I came across a fascinating discussion about restrictions on the use of photography from the event. Electronic Freedom Foundation fired the first shot, criticizing Burning Man for controlling the use of images from the event, and BM’s Andie Grace responded with a long defense of their reasons for doing so, and lively discussions ensued on other blogs. " - Pixel Vision

You might want to have a look into it, since you are Mr Photographer :)

Prime Minister John Key is going to sell New Zealand to the worldwide tourism market when he appears on a top US television show next month. Mr Key is booked for the Late Show with David Letterman while he is in New York to speak at the United Nations.

Outrageous Fortune star Tammy Davis, who plays Munter in the New Zealand TV comedy, has been found guilty of drink driving. Davis, who plays Munter on the hit TV show, was found to have been driving at nearly twice the legal limit in March this year. He was caught at the Newton on-ramp going onto the Northwestern Motorway. At a defended hearing at the Auckland District Court, Judge Hole said Davis had tried to defend the charge when he had no defence for it. Davis's reading was 798 micrograms of alcohol per litre of breath. The legal limit is 400. He's been suspended from driving for a year and given a $1600 fine.

A tense hostage situation involving convicted murderer George Charlie Baker continues to play out at Auckland Prison at Paremoremo this evening. Corrections have confirmed Baker, who is serving at least 18 years for murder, has a hostage, thought to be an 83-year-old sex offender. Baker is serving time for the murder of Liam Ashley, whom he bashed to death in the back of a Chubb prison van in 2006.

A Hollywood superstar has spent 24 hours in the country. Tom Cruise flew into New Zealand yesterday and flew out today. Newstalk ZB reported the actor was met at Wellington Airport by filmmaker Peter Jackson. Wingnut Films spokesman Matt Dravitski said Cruise knew Jackson and wanted to visit his studios. Mr Dravitski said Cruise was not discussing any future projects with Jackson. Wellingtonians reported seeing the Hollywood superstar arriving in Wellington and some say they saw him by the Weta Workshop studios in Miramar. Jackson is producing The Dam Busters and The Hobbit. Clothing retailer Cotton On has withdrawn a line of controversial baby clothes after public outcry, several protest groups say. The Cotton On T-shirts and suits, which featured slogans including "The condom broke" and "They shake me", went on sale in New Zealand last month. Last week, the T-shirts were removed from Australian shelves and the company said it "recognised that certain references are not appropriate, and will sincerely endeavour to not cross these lines again".

The severe thunderstorms which cut power and demolished property in parts of the North Island will give way to warm, fine weather this weekend. MetService warned of intermittent thundery weather until Saturday and gale-force winds on Sunday. But in between stormy spells it expected clearer conditions. A warm, dry wind from Australia would lift temperatures to nearly 20C in much of the North Island. The vicious storm early yesterday morning cut power to 8500 homes in the Bay of Plenty, as well as breaking windows and damaging property. A bolt of lightning destroyed a concrete wall and steps at a house in Tauranga, throwing debris into the air.

Drivers may be getting the message about cellphones but their attempts at playing it safe are turning Auckland motorways into "a bit of a parking lot". They are adding to safety risks already caused by breakdowns, police warn. The ban on hand-held cellphones in cars, to become law in November, has apparently prompted more motorists to stop to take calls. But police say pulling over on a motorway is dangerous as well as an offence that carries a $150 instant fine, and should not be attempted.

SIDESWIPPING IT...
A reader writes: "A lady working for the Australian branch of our company went to sit on a chair, missed and fell on her tail bone, which was bruised, resulting in a lost-time injury. After investigation, corrective measures were put in place to minimise it happening again. All New Zealand and Aussie employees had chair-sitting instructions and practice added on to their health and safety training."

The picture about was spotted in the Weekend Sun (Tauranga). "I'm not sure how well 'unforseen circumstances' reflects on a clairboyant's skills."

A BIT ARTY FARTY

"Bones" by merzlak - view here


"Burning Man Sunset" by BPinzonPhotography - view here


"Burning Man - Capital Dome" by NVMark - view here


"The Man 08" NVMark - view here

AUCKLAND FORECAST TODAY
Max: 16°C
Min: 11°C (overnight)
Humidity: 78%
Cloudy periods, odd shower possible. Strong westerlies. (Translation: Well the lighting & thunder is gone...other than that didn't pay attention.)

CURRENT WEIRDNESS
The way these other projects are popping up so Maz isn't working on her Style Pasifika stuff...

DAILY FOF MOMENT
Dee's car (he got it while we were on Spartacus) is well not good. As you know there were car problems after Body Art Awards and there have been more since. The latest one, is that he has long not only reverse, but also second and fourth. And they have only had the car a few months. Fail!!!

Day OneHundredAndFour of being Aflickionless...

RUSSELL VACCUMED and took the washing to the laundry mat...you didn't pass out did you?

WARNING
THIS IS THE LONGEST BLOG YET!!!

Maz was looking through Tina's entertainment booklet this evening and saw a voucher for salsa classes and below it was ceroc classes. She has wanted to take up a latin dance for a while, and eventually wants to learn the tango. She suggested salsa to Russell, and he pointed out the ceroc classes as he thinks that salsa is a bit too hardcore for his liking. So currently Maz is tossing up which to do, but also realises that she may get peeved with Russell doing these classes (which ever one we decide), because "must be better" and everything is a competition. We will see what happens.

JayJay is attempting a no sugar...well to cut it down...in the lead up to Style Pasifika. It's just over a week away now. AHHH!

Last night Maz decided that since she has been paying for rent & food for the past week, Russell was going to take her to Denny's for dinner tonight and he was going to pay.
Maz told SJ about this brilliant plan and she (SJ) asked if she could join, which Maz thought was a brilliant idea.
So this evening Maz, Russell & SJ went to Denny's North Shore for dinner.

NOW where to start...the funnys started flying as soon as we were all seated. While deciding on what we were going to have, Maz was waiting (she had decided last night) and she flicked to the back of the menu and said to Russell "Hey look on your birthday we can bring you here" and pointed to the menu, followed by "We could bring both you & Haydn here for your birthdays".

Thought you might want a photo so you can start deciding now

It was then decided that we have to take you both into Denny's between Monday & Wednesday because kids eat free and well if you & Russell are seniors than we must be kids...

Free Food FTW...oOo FFFTW...haha

Maz ordered a magarita at Denny's (she couldn't help herself)...and yeah there was a shot in it and yeah it tasted like a magarita, but it didn't look like one. She should know better the only place she should be getting drinks is Ginger Minx.

Does this look like a margarita to you?

Dinner must of been about 2 or more hours long, but it was so worth it. Laughing, talking, poking fun. It was brilliant. We also need to have a funky shoe party, where people have to wear their funkiest (looking not smelling) shoes...we know you have plenty of new shoes to fit this.

Since we didn't know if you would believe it unless you saw the bill. We spent $100 at Denny's tonight between three of us. The bill is all colour key so you can see who got what...hehe (GEEK)

We left Denny's just after 11pm so we can say it was def. a really good night!

Any replacement for Auckland Zoo favourite Kashin will come from established Asian elephant breeding programmes under way in Europe. But a new addition to the zoo's elephant colony - which since Kashin's death on Monday stands at one - is likely to be at least two years away. Zoo director Jonathan Wilcken yesterday said regulations did not allow for the importing of new elephants, and the zoo would have to wait for Biosecurity New Zealand to approve new quarantine standards. He said a female would be the ideal partner for Burma in the short term, with more breeding stock imported in the next four to five years.

The spring storm currently passing over the South Island has the potential to cause another avalanche. MetService has a severe weather warning in place, with heavy rain forecast for the Southern Alps and and severe gales forecast for Canterbury. Most of the South Island's ski fields were closed yesterday due to the strong winds. Mountain Safety Council spokesman Ray Goldring says the heavy rain has the potential to disrupt the mountains as it filters down through the snow.

A man with a samurai sword and ammunition belt who broke into a Christchurch home sparked an armed offenders squad (AOS) callout, before police discovered he was locked out of his house after a fancy dress party. A neighbour called police around 12.45am on Sunday after hearing a window breaking at the suburban Avondale house. When police responded, they saw the sword and belt in a vehicle. They placed a cordon around the property and called the AOS. When the AOS contacted the house's occupants, the man appeared at the door and explained his partner had locked him out of the house, so he had to break a window to get in. On closer inspection, the sword and belt were found to be props, police said.

Eating too much or too little during pregnancy has been linked in an Auckland University paper to the early onset of puberty. Studies at the university's Liggins Institute have shown a mother's diet before conception and during pregnancy and lactation affects her offspring's growth, age of puberty and later reproductive capacity in subtly differing ways. The studies were done in rats, but one of the researchers, Dr Deborah Sloboda, said there were striking parallels with some human studies and observations.

Kiwi actress and True Blood vamp Anna Paquin has a very important message she'd like to share with us all: Despite fevered gum-flapping to the contrary, she's not pregnant; although her uterus thanks us for all the attention.

SIDESWIPPING IT...
A text came through to my phone yesterday offering a deal with Christmas Hamper company Hampsta. Join to get $65 of "free stuff" it said. I rang the 0800 number provided to find the free stuff quickly became a $10 Mad Butcher voucher. The remaining $55 - a $20 joining fee and a $35 "account maintenance fee" - would be paid for you. Voila! $65 worth of free stuff. Er, not really. (Reply with STOP to make them leave you alone)

The 10 most costly wedding singers
1. Rolling Stones (up to $12 million)
2. Sir Elton John (up to $4.8 million)
3. Kylie Minogue (up to $4.8 million)
4. Christina Aguilera (up to $3.6 million)
5. George Michael ($3.1 million million)
6. Amy Winehouse ($2.4 million)
7. Sir Paul McCartney ($2.4 million)
8. Leona Lewis ($2.4 million)
9. Jennifer Lopez ($2.4 million)
10. Barry Manilow (pictured) ($1.8 million)

STUPID PEOPLE ARE FUNNY



SO NOT PC...
What do you call a Tongan dog wagging its tail?

A Happy Meal

AUCKLAND FORECAST TODAY
Max: 18°C
Min: 12°C (overnight)
Humidity: 93%
Rain developing, some thunder. Northeasterlies. (Translation: SOME thunder...how about shit loads of sheet lighting & thunder? It was nice during the day though. Sun even!!!)

CURRENT WEIRDNESS
Maz is going to be wearing a bridesmaids dress next year...it may look like the picture below *gasp*

So girly...but HAWT

DAILY FOF MOMENT
Maz & Russell went to Mc Donalds to get a snack this afternoon. Maz got two hamburgers and Russell got one double cheese burger and one standard cheese burger. Normally you get pattie in your cheese burger aye? Somebody really needs to let Mc Donalds Glenfield know aye, cause Russell's cheese burger had the cheese but ummmm something was missing. Oh that's what was missing...THE MEAT PATTIE! Fail!!!

And then this evening while at dinner with Russell & SJ we order dessert. Maz the oreo sundae, Russell the fudge cake and SJ the PIE & CAKE. The guy asked what kind of pie SJ wanted, went off and got it...hmmm something is missing from this plate. WHERE IS THE CAKE? SJ may of ordered Pie & Cake but was only served cake. FAIL!!!
So when paying SJ said about the whole Pie & Cake thing and only getting the pie. And we find out that it means one or the other not both. But did it say Pie OR Cake...NO...it said Pie AND Cake. DOUBLE FAIL!!!

To top it off when leaving Denny's Russell went to push the door (it said push) but it didn't move, so he tried to pull and that didn't work. And SJ walked to the other door, pushed it and walk right out. Bwahahaha MUNTER! That must make today a PHAIL!!!

Day OneHundredAndThree of being Aflickionless...

Maz & Russell went to look at another place today, this time out in Mt Roskil (near May Road). Maz really likes the place, plenty of room for all of the stuff and then some. 1 double bedroom, 2 single bedrooms, 1 living room, 1 dining room, separate toilet and bathroom, good size kitchen, laundry and carport. So tomorrow she is handing in the form for the house. The biggest mission is going to be finding a flatmate, but the rent will be fairly alright for whoever ends up being the flattie (Maz made sure of that when working on the costs).

This evening while getting dinner (Wendy's...Maz & Russell even ate in), Maz clicked that she has also been paying for food over the last week. So while eating dinner she told Russell that she was temped to text facebook status with "Maz Smutley...is going to hold a wee poll. She thinks that Russell should be paying for food considering that she is paying the rent. Who agrees?".
Russell didn't like this very much (Maz was really going to do it too) and after a sigh he said "You'll drag my name through the dirt and make me look bad". To which Maz responded with "You drag my head through the pillows every night and you don't see me complaining". Haha touche as SJ's mum would say. Wonder if he got the point?

Maz needs Skype...wait...Maz needs a mic.

Southbound motorists trying to get into Auckland city were reduced to a crawl after a cement mixer rolled on an inner-city road just before peak-hour traffic this evening. The Golden Bay Cement truck was lodged at the side of Sam Wrigley St in the inner city, just off the Cook St motorway off-ramp. The truck was eventually moved after nearly three hours. The off-ramp, the second exit into the city south of Auckland Harbour Bridge, was closed for over an hour before reopening after 6pm. Inspector Barry Smalley of the police northern communications centre said the truck didn't cause as many problems as might have been anticipated.

The Warehouse is recalling a batch of convection heaters after potential safety concerns were identified. The recall applies to Evantair CH-2000A basic and turbo model convection heaters purchased by customers between January 2005 and December 2007. The two recalled models have the following barcode product descriptions: 9417648400979 Heater Convection Basic 2000W (CH-2000A BAS), and 9417648400962 Heater Convection Turbo 2000W (CH-2000A TUR). The recall follows a customer complaint about a heater which was fire-damaged when left switched on overnight.

The final results of the smacking referendum have been released, showing the "yes" vote was slightly higher and the "no" vote slightly lower than preliminary figures issued on Friday. The "yes" vote was 201,541, or 11.98 per cent of those cast. Preliminary figures were 191,495, or 11.81 per cent of those cast. The "no" vote was 1,470,755, or 87.4 per cent of those cast. Preliminary figures were 1,420,959, or 87.6 per cent of those cast. The total number of valid votes cast was 1,682,717 compared with the preliminary figure of 1,622,150. The number of invalid votes cast was 1685, or 0.1 per cent of the total.

Auction website Trade Me crashed for several hours last night following "significant hardware problems". The website's disaster recovery procedures had to be implemented after "some issues...that affected our database clustering software at one of our data centres", the "tired" Trade Me technical team announced on the site at 12.45am today. The site experienced an outage at 6.55pm which lasted 15 minutes, but was down again between 9.05pm and 11.50pm. All auctions affected by the outage would be extended by 24 hours, the company said.

Shoppers buying sausage meat could have got more than they bargained for - small metal flakes. The discovery has prompted Goulds Fine Foods to recall the 500g tubes of The Valley Sausage Company sausage meat. Goulds said that the sausage meat had been sold in supermarkets in the lower North Island and Wellington region. All stores had been notified and all the remaining product had been destroyed. Goulds said there had been no reports of illness.

Scientists at the police's electronic crime laboratory have created a computerised system to help detectives examine seized computers and other items containing microchips. Other government agencies such as the Customs service are trialling the technology, and the scientists say there has been strong interest from other enforcement agencies around the world.

Drivers trying to squeeze the last kilometre from an empty fuel tank now face the prospect of a hefty fine if they run out of petrol on Auckland's motorways. Acting on a request from the police, the Transport Agency is proposing a bylaw that would make it an offence to run out of fuel anywhere on the 72.7km network. Police want the deterrent because of the number of stranded vehicles blocking lanes and endangering other motorists. During a three-week period in July last year, 148 vehicles - including three trucks - ran out of fuel on Auckland motorways.

And some entertainment news as well today...The price for spending eternity above Marilyn Monroe is more than $4.6 million. That's how much the crypt directly above the actress went for in an online auction that ended on Monday. The eBay.com listing says the space at Westwood Village Memorial Park Cemetery above Monroe is being vacated, making room for someone else. The listing also offers the detail that the current occupant is "looking face down on" Monroe, who was laid to rest at the cemetery in 1962. Bidding for the auction started at $500,000 on August 14. The final bid was $4,602,100.

The Rolling Stones charge £5 million (NZ$12m) to perform at weddings. The ageing rockers – made up of frontman Sir Mick Jagger, guitarist Keith Richards, drummer Charlie Watts and guitarist Ronnie Wood - have been named the world's most expensive wedding act, ahead of Sir Elton John and Kylie Minogue who only demand £2 million to play at nuptials.

Jessica Biel is the most dangerous celebrity on the web. Security technology company McAfee has reported that searches for the 27-year-old actress are more likely to lead to online threats such as spyware and viruses than searches for any other celebrity. McAfee said fans searching for the actress have a one-in-five chance of ending up at a website designed to damage one's computer. Its the third annual report on the subject from McAfee, which last year found that Brad Pitt was the "most dangerous" celeb online. (now everybody say..."mmmmm Jessica Biel")

SIDESWIPPING IT...
A reader realises a valuable life lesson: "I recently signed up with the IRD online to check my student loan balance. Imagine my excitement to see I had an $800 refund due from the year 2000! Then imagine my disappointment to be told I cannot get the money as too much time has passed. Sigh. Life is so unfair."

Rules are made to be broken

QUOTE OF THE DAY
"Don't put your big hunk of meat on my table" - Dee to Hez about putting the dog meat on the outside table

AUCKLAND FORECAST TODAY
Max: 17°C
Min: 12°C (overnight)
Humidity: 92%
Rain and fresh northerlies. (Translation: don't you love that word "FRESH"...current wind chill is hmmmm FRESH)

CURRENT WEIRDNESS
What is it with Sports Tonight playing background music during the articles???

DAILY FOF MOMENT
That Maz never noticed that she had been paying for dinner for the pass week, plus she does 100% of the rent. WTF? Fail!!!

Day OneHundredAndTwo of being Aflickionless...

DAY 102

Maz & SJ are feeling neglected now and can't wait for Haydn cuddles!

Last night SJ & Maz decided that they would plan you a party for your return. So you better be here on September 12th for...

Willkommen zurück

Does the image look familiar?

Chemistry is on this weekend. Who's going?
Maz has decided not to go as the Townhall reminds her of Style Pasifika. The first Style Pasifika that Maz entered was held there and seeings as it is only a week away on Friday, she believes she may be a wee stress ball by then. So she will either be at home working OR at Ginger Minx.

Maz can now also update her Facebook status via text. It's taken her long enough, we know, BUT the downside is that Good Old Faithful doesn't have internet access, so there for she can't read the full response when somebody comments.

Auckland Zoo will be closed tomorrow as staff grieve the loss of 40-year-old elephant, Kashin, who died today. The female elephant, who has been at the zoo for 36 years, was euthanased after losing her battle with chronic health conditions. "Zoo staff are devastated, grieving the loss of their incredibly spirited and gentle matriarch," zoo chairman Graeme Mulholland said. "Kashin touched the lives, not just of the zoo family, but thousands of New Zealanders and international visitors who came to know and love her... she will be greatly missed by all." He said the decision to put the elephant down followed years of chronic arthritis and foot abscesses. More recently she had developed skin infections over her body that were not healing. Kashin's death was expected to have an impact on the zoo's remaining elephant - 26-year-old Burma - who would be closely monitored as another elephant was sought. In March, the Auckland City Council approved a succession plan for the zoo, quelling fears that Kashin and Burma would be the last elephants to live there. The zoo plans to build a herd of three males and two females between 2011 and 2015. The zoo will re-open on Wednesday.

Now we normally only cover New Zealand news, but I couldn't pass this up...CAIRNS - Authorities in far north Queensland are outraged after a "sick joke" forced the humiliating rescue of a man who became stuck to the seat of a shopping centre toilet. Police and community leaders have appealed for public help to find the prankster or pranksters responsible for the incident, which resulted in the 58-year-old man being taken to hospital. Ambulance officers were called about 10.30am (AEST) on Saturday to rescue the man after he sat on toilet seat which had been smeared with a fast-acting adhesive. He was forced to undergo the humiliation of leaving the Cairns Central shopping centre with the seat still attached to his behind, in full view of a busy crowd of Saturday morning shoppers. Police say he was then taken to hospital where staff removed the fixture using industrial strength solvents. The man is said to be extremely embarrassed by the ordeal.

A dramatic rise in violent crime committed by young women over the past two months has Wanganui police and social workers concerned. Senior Sergeant Dave Kirby said of the eight people locked up in Wanganui police cells over the past week, seven were teenage girls. Two teen girls wearing balaclavas and scarves over their faces allegedly held a dairy owner at knife-point and stole cash and cigarettes on July 22. A 13-year-old and a 16-year-old were charged over the incident. Four teenage girls allegedly attacked two girls in Queens Park beside the Wanganui Public Library on August 18, stealing their cell phones and other items. Two girls, aged 14 and 15, appeared in Youth Court this week in relation to the incident. Mr Kirby told the Wanganui Chronicle it was sad to see such behaviour by young girls.

Up to 900 Telecom lines engineers are going on strike, coinciding with the company's first redundancies in Auckland and Northland. It also follows a series of strikes and work-bans that have seen at least one broadband supplier advise customers of significant disruption. EPMU spokesman Joe Gallagher says Telecom's contracting model is putting the future of New Zealand's network at risk. He says the dispute is not just about members' employment, but about an industry that has been run-down and squeezed for profit until it is dry. He points out that a lot of our telecommunications infrastructure dates back to the 1930s.

Everyone from schoolchildren to world-acclaimed architects can submit ideas from today to redevelop Queens Wharf for the 2011 Rugby World Cup. The first stage of the competition is aimed at creative and innovative ideas before up to eight teams are chosen to submit detailed designs. The challenge of transforming the historic wharf as a magnet for the cup and beyond has been costed at up to $76 million, $20 million more than the budget set by Auckland City Council. Read More...

SIDESWIPPING IT...
After half-dying from what must have been swine flu, a reader rang a Government-funded health line. "Late at night, no answer. Rang again at 6am, no answer. Same at 7am. At 8am someone picks up ... 15 minutes of her telling me how amazing their treatment plan was going to be once we completed the triage questions ... the second of which was, 'Do you think you are pregnant?' Being male, I didn't think that was too likely. After a further 15 minutes the answer came in ... 'it says, go to the doctor'. "

This smokers' ash receptacle, spotted on a wall in Nuffield St in Newmarket, is either crying out for some punctuation, or is stating that we need smokers on every street corner to make the area beautiful, says Jeremy.

THE WEIRDO OF THE BUNCH

Taken at Toto's on Saturday night

AUCKLAND FORECAST TODAY
Max: 16°C
Min: 12°C (overnight)
Humidity: 88%
Mostly cloudy, chance shower. Northeasterlies. (Translation: it was a tad bit nipply tonight)

CURRENT WEIRDNESS
How cold it is today, compared to other days recently...

DAILY FOF MOMENT
Maz emailed about the price of a house this afternoon. Was listed to be $470 per week, but in the description it said $490 per week (natural wtf). So the guy calls and he says that it's $490 per week, not $470.
So Maz was like "okay, that's all I wanted to know". And he presses to ask "why did you want to know?" (he sounded offended that Maz asked about the price thing)...he hung up/got cut off before Maz could say "it was a budget thing". Seriously do retards not realise how much of a different $470 and $490 is when looking for a place to live, especially when said house is across the road from BK at Mt Roskil shops. Fail!!!

Day NintyEight of being Aflickionless...

Maz has been gluing and planning the rest of the disco ball mirror pattern. Creating, Style Pasifika, Moving AND to top it off Maz's dad is coming up to Auckland at the end of September and is going to visit/meet up with her. They haven't seen each other in about 4 years.
Maz is also loving the latest La Roux track..."I'm Not Your Toy".

JayJay gets really pissed off when people drive through red lights and make the people that are crossing on a green walking man have to dodge their cars. Yesterday someone did it and got snapped by a cop and then today someone did it and came extremely close to hitting JayJay and another chick - the green walking man had been going for at least 5 secs so he couldnt claim that the light had only just changed. They nearly got hit and it pissed JayJay off, so she kicked his car in the passengers side rear door as hard as she could as he went by them and left a big massive dent for the dick head.
The other chick who was also crossing the road turned and looking at JayJay who said "you didn't just see that". The other female was like "ok, but nice kick".
ALSO the lights at the base of parnell rise were out at like 5:30pm so it was utter chaos and there was 1 cop directing traffic (and its a massive set of lights)! It was really funny when he let the people cross because he started screaming "CROSS NOW", and trying to point at the people while not leting any cars go so they could get safely to the other side.

THANK YOU the closing party for Space is on this weekend. Looks like Maz is going along at this stage. No idea what it will be like, but cheap drinks on the night so they will help make it better. Haha!

The public should continue to keep children and dogs away from beaches in Auckland's Hauraki Gulf while the source of a mystery toxic poison is investigated. Five dogs have died and 14 fallen ill after visiting the beaches. Auckland Regional Public Health Service (ARPHS) said tetrododoxin, a potentially fatal and extremely poisonous neurotoxin found in puffer fish, has been found in dead sea slugs and the vomit of one dead dog. The latest dog died after exercising at Stanmore Bay during the weekend. Government scientists were investigating the death.

Auction website Trade Me has entered the online wine market but sellers will have to hold an off-licence certificate. The company said it had been given the go-ahead to sell wine by the Liquor Licensing Authority. Trade Me spokesman Michael Gregg said it had debated wine sales for a long time.

A piece of playground equipment which resides at Auckland Zoo is turning 50. The dragon will undergo a birthday makeover and will be off display from August 31 until its unveiling and birthday celebration on October 3. The zoo is encouraging people to send in historic photos of the 15 metre icon to mark its half century. All photos will be displayed and a prize draw will be held.

Former Prime Minister Helen Clark has been named as one of the most powerful women in the world by Forbes magazine. Topping the 100 Most Powerful Women list is German Chancellor Angela Merkel followed by leaders of major international companies. Miss Clark, who is now head of the United Nations development programme in New York, has been named at 60 in the list. (awww good old Uncle Helen)

Auckland's harbour bridge clip-ons could be candidates for "orthopaedic surgery" which would enable walking and cycling paths to be added and could improve their longevity. The Transport Agency has been given a proposal by engineering consultants working with the Getacross campaign to find ways of adding walking and cycling links without shortening the life of the 40-year-old clip-ons.

Australian Robert Chester-Master has skydived over a Brisbane beach at the age of 84 to remember the young New Zealand pilot who saved his life in World War II. John Lawrie lived on his father's Taranaki dairy farm before joining the Royal NZ Air Force. He died on August 13, 1944, after a German night fighter attacked and crippled his Lancaster bomber over the River Meuse in Belgium. The big aircraft, homebound from a raid on a German engine plant near Frankfurt, began losing height and one by one the engines failed. Lawrie, the captain, held the plane aloft long enough for the other six men in his crew, Chester-Master among them, to take to their parachutes.

SIDESWIPPING IT...
Clayton Pinkney came across this terrifying scene at work. Terrifying because that's his car on the left! "The driver thought I was over-reacting when I told her that her parking sucked," he says. Remarkably there was no damage.

The lowest grade in the American education system has always been an F, but Simon Fraser University in British Columbia is introducing a grade of FD - meaning failure with dishonesty. Dr Rob Gordon, chairman of the senate committee on academic integrity, says the new grading is intended to curtail cheating using the internet.

Advertising outside Phoenix Takeaways in Manurewa.

AUCKLAND FORECAST TODAY
Max: 14°C
Min: 9°C (overnight)
Humidity: 81%
Fine breaks increasing. Southeast breeze. Friday (Translation: southeast breeze...cold. but that's why somebody created the heater...not that I've had mine on)

CURRENT WEIRDNESS
JayJay hasn't read the blog in about a month...SLACKER!

DAILY FOF MOMENT
thinking, thinking...there isn't one that I know of, but more than likely Maz is going to fail and cut herself on the disco ball mirrors again. Fail!!!

Day NintySeven of being Aflickionless...

Maz is kicked back listening to this evenings Criminal Cuts and distroying DISCO BALLS! Yes, she got more and is starting to live by "you can never have too many disco balls".

And if you didn't know...THERE IS A GOD! Orange M&M's...FUCK YEAH! They are orange (funny that) and white.

The streets of the Waikato town of Huntly are piled with rubbish after residents found themselves victims of a hoax.

The householders received a letter telling them to leave any junk kerbside for a mid-winter inorganic rubbish collection from August 15, with collection starting August 25.

The flier, bearing a letterhead which the hoaxers apparently took from the Waikato District Council website, said that the collection presented "a good chance to clean up around the house".

"All inorganic forms of rubbish will be collected, old fridges, stoves, car parts, corrugated iron, timber, carpet etc," it said.

However, the council said this week it was unaware of the lleter and has ordered the residents to take their trash back into their houses. Huntly resident Olivia Jones was not amused by the caper. "Our family spent all day clearing out our junk," she told the Waikato Times. "What a stupid prank." Council general manager for water and facilities Richard Banks told Radio New Zealand two theories for the duplicitous dumping were being "bandied about". "One is that it's being done as a hoax. The other is someone is being entrepreneurial - trying to get people to put out material they could get some value from, before the normal collection service is provided."

Motorists are being warned of snow falling on the Desert Rd. MetService has issued a snowfall warning near the summit of the Desert Rd which will continue through-out this afternoon. Up to 10cm of snow could accumulate on the higher parts of the road.

Children who are not immunised against measles risk being sent home from school, the Ministry of Health warned today. The warning comes amid growing concerns about a potential epidemic, with the number of notified measles cases this year already seven times higher than the total number of cases last year. The ministry said in a statement that infected students and teachers would be excluded from school for seven days from the appearance of the rash. Those who were not immunised and were exposed to infected people would be excluded from school for 14 days from their last contact, the ministry said.

The Bay of Plenty has been rattled by a 5.4 magnitude earthquake. It struck 10 kilometres south-west of Tauranga at a depth of 300 kilometres at 7.16am. GNS Science says it was strong enough to have been felt in parts of Wellington and Levin. (I think I need a new label "Earthquake"...we've had a few)

Police have laid further charges against an Auckland actor who police shot after he allegedly threatened them when he made a false domestic violence complaint.

Rob Mokaraka, 36, was shot in the chest after allegedly lunging at police with what they said appeared to be knives and a meat cleaver outside a house in Pt Chevalier on July 27. He was due to appear at Auckland District Court this morning to face one count of possession of an offensive weapon and another of assault with a weapon. But Judge Nicola Mathers said Mokaraka was still in hospital and a medical certificate excused him from appearing. Two new charges were laid today by police: threatening to kill and using a firearm to resist arrest.

Concerns have been raised that icecream in a cone from the local dairy could contain a nasty surprise. Kim Schultz, 12, a student at Columba College in Dunedin, has found a disturbing statistic in a humble school science project: that five out of 17 vanilla icecreams bought from Dunedin dairies had E. coli bacteria at levels far in excess of the New Zealand Food Safety Authority (NZFSA) guidelines. Some of the samples had an E. coli count in the millions, when it should have been only 100 per gram, Kim said. E. coli infection can result in severe stomach cramps, nausea, vomiting and diarrhoea. One icecream sample also contained staphylococcus aureus bacteria, which can lead to serious illness.

ACT leader Rodney Hide has set himself firmly against having any Maori seats on the new Auckland 'super city' council but denies he is holding the Government to ransom over the controversial issue.

SIDESWIPPING IT...
Looks like MP Paula Bennett and Kath and Kim's Gina Riley may have been separated at birth ... now that would make a "noiyce", different and "unewesual" episode!

At Ngatea Water Gardens, Estelle Seaman of Torbay was mortified to see live fish being fed to the turtles. "Fish are placed in a small pond to be attacked and eaten, from the tail end, while they try desperately to get away. One fish was seen still alive, with its tail and about two centimetres of its body missing! A slow and agonising death, not a sight for the kids. Reason for this needless suffering? Apparently this is what happens in the wild, according to the manager." (OH FUCK ME...what is with these PC people. Surprise, surprise she is from the shore)

Peta's latest campaign to encourage a vegetarian lifestyle targets overweight women. The "Save the Whales" billboard campaign in Jackson, Florida shows the back of a large woman in a bikini, and the slogan: "Lose the Blubber, Go Vegetarian." (If you are as big as a whale and wearing a bikini you should be SHOT! with an elephant gun)

Catherine was stopped in her tracks after seeing this male/female icon painted on the car parks at Albany Mall. Aside from two parks, all the others are marked for parents with babies. "Not sure what these are meant to be for ... people who really need a toilet? People that don't know if they're male or female? Anyone who is either male or female? Maybe it's a hidden portal to Narnia?"

AUCKLAND FORECAST TODAY
Max: 15°C
Min: 9°C (overnight)
Humidity: 86%
Cloudy periods. Southerlies. (Translation: OMG there was no rain or showers...)

CURRENT WEIRDNESS
How many disco balls Maz has distroyed...

DAILY FOF MOMENT
Maz needed a measure of JayJay's back for the Style Pasifika creation, however JayJay couldnt text her the measurement because all she had at home to measure with was a 15cm hard ruler. And then she forgot to grab a tape measure from work. Fail!!!